How often do you find yourself comparing your life to those around you? Your house is not designed as well as theirs, your weight is different than theirs, your career path does not seem as big of a deal as theirs, your kids are not as put together or “successful” as theirs. Or maybe you compare yourself to a version of you that you have not attained. You’re not where you thought you would be at 25, 35, 45, etc. The list of comparisons can go on and on. Especially in these social media days, it is so easy to see the highlight reel of everyone’s lives and compare that to our own blooper reel. Everyone has a blooper reel……but they don’t necessarily share it for all to see. What we often do share is the image, video, post, of the best view….the highlight reel. These comparisons are thinking traps that will leave you forever dissatisfied and focused on the life you don’t have while you miss out on the life you do have and the life that you can cultivate if you tend to your own garden rather than watching everyone else’s bloom. You will never have a flourishing life if you are only focused on what other people are doing with their lives. Our brains use a confirmation bias to remain satisfied. This confirmation bias leads us to look for evidence that confirms our beliefs. If you wake up looking at everyone’s social media highlights and believing that their lives are better than yours, the confirmation bias will result in you finding all the evidence that confirms that your life is horrible and theirs is great. If you wake up, tend to your life, and believe that it is great then you will go through your day finding all the evidence that confirms that your life is great. This leads to you believing that because it is great it is worth tending to and cultivating and from there the cycle continues to YOUR life blooming.
We were not created to live identical lives to those around us. Your race was set out for you and you alone. No one else can run your race as well as you can. You were meant to run the race marked out for you, not anyone else’s race. You can choose to stay in your own lane by keeping your primary focus on your life and how to cultivate it to be the best live you can live.
Stay in your own lane this week and live your best life!
Jessica Snyder, LCP